I participated in my third NaNoWriMo this year…and I didn't make it. It's my third NaNoWriMo, and I made it the other two times, so it's not that the goal is out of my reach just on principle. And I made a respectable chunk of words. A little over 31,000 of them. Some of them are even good, but I didn't make 50K in November.
I'm not good at not finishing things. I'm not a person with a trail of unfinished projects left in the closets of my life. I'm not a quitter. Generally, if I say I'm doing something, I am. I've got a combination of German immigrant work ethic (thanks Grandma Lena) and Jewish guilt (thanks Grandma Alice). That makes me a workhorse of a woman who gets things done. Maybe that's why it feels so strange that I didn't finish this…and I'm oddly kind of okay with that.
Generally, I'm not okay with it when I don't finish things. Does this mean I'm growing up? Or something more sinister? Am I knowing my limits and being reasonable or selling myself short?
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What I wanted out of NaNoWriMo was a jump start for this novel, the third in my Menopausal Superhero series (working title: Face the Change). A healthy start so that I can get it finished by early in the year, through my critique group and ready for the publisher by June. And though I didn't get 50,000 words, I did get what I wanted in that sense.
On an average month, during the school year, when I'm balancing the day job and the family and my annoying need for sleep, I write 250-800 words a day. So, for a thirty day month, that's 7,500-24,000 words. It's probably closer to 7,500 than to 24,000 most months. A lot of times those aren't all on one project, but might include blog posts, articles, short stories, and novel progress. So 30K all on one project? That's a damn fine chunk of words, and definitely moves me a giant step nearer finishing in a timely manner.
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On the other hand, I might be setting a dangerous precedent for myself by not meeting a deadline and being okay with that. What if this becomes an attitude I have to fight in myself? Meeting deadlines is one of the most important things a writer needs to learn to do. If you miss deadlines, and people can't rely on you for what you promised, then you stop get invited to do things. Things like submit to anthologies, or participate in author events.
I'm overthinking it, probably. So, what do you think IWSGers? What's the line? How do you tell when it's healthy to let go of something and when it's a cop out?
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This posting is part of the Insecure Writers Support Group blog hop. To check out other posts by writers in a variety of places in their careers, check out the participant list. This group is one of the most open and supportive groups of people I have ever been associated with. If you write, you should check them out!
This posting is part of the Insecure Writers Support Group blog hop. To check out other posts by writers in a variety of places in their careers, check out the participant list. This group is one of the most open and supportive groups of people I have ever been associated with. If you write, you should check them out!
You didn't write about WHY you didn't finish, and I'll bet there is an excellent reason. So I wouldn't worry. 31K is nothing to sneeze at, and puts you in a good place to reach your goals. I say congratulations to that!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Liza. There are many reasons, of course. Mostly, I blame the children. :-)
DeleteHi Samantha, I've done 25,000 words twice during NaNo. That's as good as it got. I'm happy with the results. Just not enough time to do the 50,000 words.
ReplyDeleteIt's definitely faster than my usual pace, which has its advantages and disadvantages. Sometimes it's good not to have too much time to think; sometimes it means your ideas come out half-baked.
DeleteOverthinking, maybe? But important things to think about! Nano is an imposed deadline but not one with a real consequence except to yourself. Fast drafting is not for everyone. I think it's worth trying out, but not every writer finds success working that way. Stay encouraged!
ReplyDeleteI can be my own harshest critic though . . .but I'm trying not to beat myself up. There's plenty of other things in the world to do that for me.
DeleteNo overthinking!
ReplyDeleteMaybe deep inside, you really did just want a jump start and winning wasn't the ultimate goal? As you said, that's a huge chunk of words.
True. And way more than I'd normally get in a month.
DeleteI hear you. I've never yet not won a Nano, and I know if it came to that point where I'd have to let go of that win, I'd be going through the very same struggles.
ReplyDeleteHowever, from that perspective I can also assure you that it's extremely unlikely that one "only" 60% finished NaNo (that's still 30k words!!) is going to turn you into a chronic quitter. I very much doubt you'd have that in you.
The fact I worry about it probably means I don't, right? Kind of like worrying you might be crazy means you probably aren't?
DeleteReading about your work ethic, I'd definitely say you're overthinking it :)
ReplyDeleteYou do, however, have a great head's start, so I wish you the best finishing the novel :)
Best regards,
Mark (IWSG co-host, author and certified slacker:)
Thanks :-) You'll probably hear it here first when I do finish it.
DeleteI know your pain, Samantha. I didn't manage to finish this year either, having won three times before. I've taken it very hard, I feel gutted. Disappointed, not in myself...I know I did my level best...but disappointed my health let me down....again!
ReplyDeleteLike you, I got a great head start on my next novel, 35,000+ words, and I'm delighted with that, but I loved 'winning' NaNo those other times, and, like you, I like to finish what I start.
But I don't think you're becoming a quitter, because you didn't quit. Neither did I. Circumstances did not favour us this time. Perhaps they will next time.
Happy writing at a manageable pace, that's winning now.
Thanks, Christine. Here's to both of us having an excellent writing month in December!
DeleteThe question to ask yourself is are you farther along in the story than you were when you began NaNo. If the answer is yes, than you are a success.
ReplyDeleteDefinitely, definitely yes :-)
DeleteCongrats on your 31,000 words, partner! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks so much! The good news, I'll probably get to keep quite a few of them!
DeleteThanks, Karen. I feel in my heart that I didn't really fail either. If I hadn't signed on for NaNoWriMo and wrote 31K in a normal month, I'd be jumping for joy. It's silly to get worked up otherwise.
ReplyDeleteI think you are overthinking it a bit. You went into to the month knowing there were time commitments that were likely to get in the way of getting to 50,000 words. You set out to get a good chunk of the third book in that series done, and you accomplished that. Nano can be a great way to jumpstart a project. You did that so I feel the month was a success.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Elizabeth. I know I'm an overthinker, and it's good to have people who can tell me when I'm giving in to it.
Delete