IWSG: Recovering from Writer Burnout

Welcome to the first Wednesday of the month. This month you get two posts in one: It's the Insecure Writer's Support Group blog hop AND it's the blog tour for Chrys Fey's Keep Writing with Fey. 

The awesome co-hosts for the August 5 posting of the IWSG are Susan Baury Rouchard, Nancy Gideon, Jennifer Lane, Jennifer Hawes, Chemist Ken, and Chrys Fey! Please check out their posts and others in the IWSG blog hop when you finish here!
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When writer's burnout hit me, it came as a real shock. Up until that moment, writing had been how I coped with other kinds of burnout, how I found my fun and kept in contact with my creative spark. While I had felt burnt out in many other aspects of my life (parenting, teaching, housekeeping, adulting) I had *never* lost the joy in writing. But that's exactly what happened to me in 2018. 

The direct cause was publisher trouble. I won't rehash the details here, but you can read about it in this old blog post if you're interested. Other causes were more internal--I'd put a lot of pressure on myself to produce a book every year, and I'd done it, releasing a book in 2015, 2016, and 2017. But come 2018, I faltered, my confidence shaken.  

I felt exhausted at a soul level. I had to fight anger and pessimism within myself as never before--I am usually, by nature, an optimist with a good layer of scotch guard that lets bad moments wash over me without sticking. But I took any small setback to heart, and started to feel like I'd overestimated myself. The self-talk got ugly and damaging sometimes. Doubt is mean. 

I tried a lot of things during this time:

• pomodoros instead of word count to track my progress
• crying
• switching up my projects often
• going for more walks
• taking a hiatus from my critique group
• coloring
• journaling
• chocolate
• doing more "play writing" in the form of writing prompts

Despite my good fortune in making a relatively smooth transition from one publisher to another, I felt like my writing career had barely gotten started and then got the wind kicked out of it, I felt desperate to make progress…and we all know how attractive desperation is. 

Still, I did start to come out of it after a few months. 

The most important thing I did was to talk to other writers, sharing what I was feeling and listening to

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their stories and advice in turn. Across the board, they assured me that everything I was feeling was normal, that burnout happens even in work that brings you joy. They told me about what they liked about my work, reassuring me that my work had value and interest to the world. 

In short, they were good friends. Offering me counsel, support, a listening ear, and chocolate, in whatever proportions were needed. They cared about me and pulled me through to the other side. They reminded me to give myself the patience, grace, and compassion I would have offered to anyone else in the same situation. 

One of those writing friends was Chrys Fey. And now she's collected some of her experiences and advice on coming back from burnout in a new book!  

Catch the sparks you need to conquer writer’s block, depression, and burnout!

When Chrys Fey shared her story about depression and burnout, it struck a chord with other writers. That put into perspective for her how desperate writers are to hear they aren’t alone. Many creative types experience these challenges, battling to recover. Let Keep Writing with Fey: Sparks to Defeat Writer's Block, Depression, and Burnout guide you through:

 

∙        Writer's block

∙        Depression

∙        Writer's burnout

∙        What a writer doesn’t need to succeed

∙        Finding creativity boosts

 

With these sparks, you can begin your journey of rediscovering your creativity and get back to what you love - writing.

 

 

BOOK LINKS:

 

Amazon / Nook / iTunes / Kobo

 

Goodreads

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Chrys Fey is the author of Write with Fey: 10 Sparks to Guide You from Idea to Publication. She is also the author of the Disaster Crimes series. Visit her blog, Write with Fey, for more tips on how to reverse writer’s burnout. https://www.chrysfey.com/

The Importance of Momentum

So, I recently had to take a hard pivot in my writing life. 

I was chugging along on a Gothic romance and loving it, when it hit me that I only had six months left to write the fourth Menopausal Superhero novel and I'd better get that puppy going. I'm grateful that I have a publisher waiting for my work, and accept that having that comfortable situation comes with costs, such as deadlines. But it wasn't easy to switch gears. 

Getting back to the Menopausal Superheroes came with some extra challenges as well. While I'd worked through edits over the past year for two new novella releases in the series (third one coming in August!), which kept a hand in, I hadn't written anything new for these characters in more than two years. There's some emotional baggage with that, including a bad breakup with a publisher. 

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So, I started by reading my own books. Re-immersing myself in the world and making notes about little character details that had grown fuzzy in the two years I wrote other stuff. 

Re-reading your own work is a fraught process. If things are going well, you're growing and learning, so looking back at your old work can be painful. You're like, "Dang, I could do this so much better now." 

And I did experience a bit of that, but I found that I still love my characters and my world, which is good news since I've promised to write at least two more of these!

I guess I thought that as soon as I'd selected a couple of threads to pick up, I'd sit down and the words would just flow. 

But that isn't what happened. I struggled. Heck, sometimes I chose to work on peeling off old wallpaper in my office rather than tussle with my imagination. 

You'd think I'd know by now, but I'd entirely forgotten the role of momentum in writing. 

In some ways, I have a lot of momentum going. I write every single day, come hell or high water, whether or not G-d is willing or the creek rises. My daily writing chain is approaching seven years in length. In that sense, at least, I've got discipline at this point. 

That's some serious momentum. 

But it's not momentum on this project. The Menopausal Superheroes lost momentum in the struggles with that first publisher and the transfer of rights, then on-boarding with the new publisher. 

In the scheme of things, I did that quickly and smoothly compared to how badly it can go, but still, momentum was lost, not just with readers, but with me, the writer! I took on other writing projects and let the superheroes sit, waiting for their moment. 

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So, of course, when their moment arrived, it wasn't instantly beautiful again. Hopefully it doesn't sound too crazy to suggest that I had to work with the characters a bit again, to get them to trust me again and start talking to me. 

But here we are one month into working on the new book, and I've hit a good stride. 

I know I'll hit more walls and have ups and downs as the process continues. After all, this isn't my first rodeo anymore. Hopefully that will keep me going when the going gets rough again. 

But, for now, I'm happy to have made the first little hill on the rollercoaster. I'm strapping in, knowing the ride will get bumpy, but all so ready for the journey! Wish me luck. 

Switching Gears

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I've been working on a novel for about a year (a gothic romance, working title The Architect and the Heir). It's going well and I want to keep plugging away on it. I gave myself "until school ends" to finish a draft…and I failed to do so. 

I made great progress, especially considering that I do this part time and you know…COVID, police violence, terrifying fascism rearing its ugly head everywhere. If 2020 is the year of seeing clearly, I sometimes wish I could back to being blind. 

And now, I have to shelve A&H and switch gears, hard turn to starboard. 

The reasons are positive. I have a contract! That's a lucky position for an author to be in: knowing I have a publisher ready and waiting for my book, willing to help bring it out there into the world. 

But contracts come with deadlines--external deadlines, imposed because of schedules for editing, proofreading, cover art, etc. My next deadline is January, which means it's time to set down Devon and Victor and pick up the Menopausal Superheroes again or I won't make it. 

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I'm also coming back to this series after a nearly two year break during which I worked primarily on other fiction: short stories, editing for work that already been submitted, and another shelved novel before this one. So, I'm feeling a little daunted. 

This is the first time in my writing career (all five years of it) that this has happened to me. I've heard other writers talk about juggling different projects and now I finally understand how wrenching it can be to slam on the brakes and screech to a halt, leaving good rubber on the road, so I can keep my promises. It's not that I don't love the other projects, too--I totally do! It's just the moment of switching gears that hurts a bit. 

I'm hopeful though, that Devon and Victor will be there waiting for me when I come back to them. I've made good notes about where the story is going. I have already managed to set it aside three times in the past few months to complete edits on novellas for the Menopausal Superhero stories, and each time I fell back in within a few days. 

Any advice for me on switching gears and finding my groove on the new thing quickly? The clock is running guys, so I need to get this booty moving! I'd love to hear your ideas in the comments!

Scattered Focus: IWSG March 2020

Welcome to the first Wednesday of the month. You know what that means! It's time to let our insecurities hang out. Yep, it's the Insecure Writer's Support Group blog hop. If you're a writer at any stage of career, I highly recommend this blog hop as a way to connect with other writers for support, sympathy, ideas, and networking.

If you're a reader, it's a great way to peek behind the curtain of a writing life.

The awesome co-hosts for the March 4 posting of the IWSG are Jacqui Murray, Lisa Buie-Collard, Sarah Foster, Natalie Aguirre, and Shannon Lawrence! I hope you'll check out their blogs as well as some of the others on this blog hop after you see what I have to say.
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In some ways, I'm a very disciplined writer. I write every day and have for more than six years now. But as my career has progressed, I feel overwhelmed by commitments and by "shoulds" sometimes to the point that my energy feels completely scattered, so even when I am being very productive, I feel like I'm not, which makes it hard to keep heart.

Currently, I try to:

• post on instagram daily
• blog once a week
• participate in some kind of promotional activity for my published work once a month
• move forward in the WIP novel every week
• take advantage of short story opportunities (invitations, interesting open calls) as they arise
• keep my unpublished work on submission 
• meet deadlines for work I've got in process (edits, proofreads, submission dates, etc.)
• keep up with communications (emails, responses to social media)
• send a newsletter once a month to my subscribers
• journal or do day pages often enough to let new ideas develop on the back burner
• track the business end of things to make sure my contracts are followed and royalties are paid
• play (write things that I don't have solid goals for, but am writing because I want to and enjoy it)

That's a lot to balance. Especially when you consider that I do this alongside a day job (teaching middle school Spanish) and house and family responsibilities. I can generally get 1-2 hours for writing life on a school day and 4-5 on a school holiday. Though I think it would still be a lot to balance if I were a full time writer without other jobs. 

When I talk to other writers about this, I get a lot of sympathetic nods, but not many solutions offered. I know I'm not alone in the struggle to pursue my dreams while still keeping a roof over my head, a car to drive, groceries, and insurance for my family. 

Saying no is scary--refusing opportunities can mean that you don't get a repeat offer or that you miss out on something that might really have served you well. But all the same, I'm learning to use that word more often, to really analyze each blip across my radar and consider whether it's helping or just keeping me from focusing "where it matters." 

I guess that's the real rub: figuring out "where it matters." 

How about all you other creatives out there? How do you choose where to focus your energy? What balls are you juggling to keep your creative life moving in the direction you want? How do you keep heart when it gets overwhelming? Inquiring minds want to know! Tell me in the comments!

Summer's End

LeSigh. Can summer really already be over? I didn't get it all done again, of course. Doing *everything* I want to do every summer would require at least five women, and my cloning experiments failed (my daughters turned out to be their own women, with their own things they want to do).

Still, it was a good summer. As I start to have end-of-summer panic, I need to remind myself of that.

Longtime readers already know that I'm a middle school Spanish teacher in my day job, and that writing novels is my secret identity (which I'm trying to make less secret, so people will know I write books and maybe even buy them).

So, summer is, in part, about self-care and recovery for me. It's also my time to live life as a full time writer for a few weeks. So, I'm always trying to balance writing productivity with rest and recuperation and progress on all those life tasks that are hard to complete when I'm not available during business hours (August-June).

To feel good, I really need all three things: rest, writing, and life/project time.

As I write this, I'm at the beach, making sure that I end my time with sea salt on my skin and a brain scrubbed clean by sand. I did pretty well on the rest and recuperation angle.

I walked damn near every day with my dog, ate breakfast (a luxury I can't find time for during school), read sixteen books (and may finish another one or two this week), visited my parents for a few days, took a nap a few times (I'm terrible at napping, even when I need to), and watched more television than I watched in the entire six previous months (I finished a few shows: Good Omens, Wynonna Earp, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, Black Lightning, The Boys, and, of course, Stranger Things). I started Downton Abbey, so that'll probably take me all school year to finish now :-)

Home/life productivity gets a middling score. There was one big thing I wanted to get done involving paperwork and I didn't get there, because I couldn't find all the right pieces. I admit to procrastinating on looking, and I'm mad at my past self for being so bad at sticking to ONE organizational system for important papers so you can find them when you need them. Luckily there isn't a hard deadline on that one, so I can keep looking and get it done this fall.

I did work out some financing for a home improvement project that will make a big difference to our lives, and I did get my home office several steps closer to the space I want it to be. I'm especially proud of that since everything I've done in there, I've paid for with writing money only (which is why it's all DIY and second hand, but still: I paid for it with my writing money).

Some of my home/life project energies went to my oldest daughter, helping her arrange her college monies for fall and move into her FIRST APARTMENT! (yikes, I'm old).

Writing went well. I set aside the novel I've been working on for the past year (YA dystopian romance, working title: Thursday's Children). It needs more time to simmer before I can get that dish ready to serve and I finally admitted it.

I started a new novel (gothic romance, working title: The Architect and The Heir) and made lots of progress on my first all-indie project, a collection of 13 weird tales I plan to release this Halloween, choosing and organizing the stories, self-editing, arranging for cover art and professional proofreading, and learning some new software for formatting.

My daily writing chain is now 2,144 days longs (nearly six years), and summer's work included nearly 35,000 words on the new novel. It's flowing well, which speaks to the importance of following your passion in your writing (another balance: between focus and dogged stubbornness).

I've wanted to write a gothic romance since I first read one, when I was around eleven years old. It took me a while to actually do it, but it's the most fun I've had since the first Menopausal Superhero novel.

I think I probably wrote this post primarily for myself, to look back on in a couple of weeks when I'm haranguing myself and accusing myself of having wasted my entire summer once I'm buried up to the neck in schoolwork. After all, I hold myself to very high expectations on a lot of fronts. I'm meaner to myself than I would ever be to anyone else. So, it's good to make myself admit from time to time, that I got this!

Summer Writing

Summer is here! As I write this, I've been on summer vacation for (checks watch--remembers I don't have one and checks phone) 1.5 days!

As a teacher-writer-mother, I look forward to summertime all year for the control over my schedule and ability to focus more on my writing life instead of shoehorning it in around school demands. And I've made it! I'm a full time writer, for almost two months in a row.

As a 21st century woman though, I always want more out of my time than I can actually get, so here are my tips for managing a mother-writer summer schedule.

For context, my kids are currently 12 and 19, with the 19 year old living forty-five minutes away from home, near enough that I can see her often, and be there to help her when needed, but not part of my daily dinner plan.

1. Chunk your time: I'd love to have all day every day of summer for my writing life, but that's not realistic given the parameters of my life, so I just snag *part* of each day for writing.

I tend to think of my day in three chunks: morning, afternoon, evening. Because my tween will sleep as late as I let her, it generally goes: morning for me, afternoon for house/daughters, evening for family. This keeps things from bleeding into my writing time too much, but still leaves me pretty flexible during each chunk of day.

I get up when my husband gets up for work even though I could probably get away with sleeping later. I'm a total wimp about the heat, so I get outside for my exercise first: a walk or a run with my dog immediately before the summer sun is fully awake and trying to bake us alive. This has the added benefit of waking up my brain in a pleasant environment.

Then, I start all the appliances, so clean dishes and laundry (and sometimes even lunch: go rice cooker and instant pot!) happen while I'm not looking, and it's breakfast and writing time. I try to stop at lunch time.

Afternoons are for running errands and making sure the tween has some fun and doesn't turn into a total lump of lazy. Often I can write during this time as well, jotting down thoughts in the notes app on my phone and handling the social media commitment of a writing life during the waiting moments. If there's a playdate or mom couch time and my interaction level is lower, I steal that for writing, too.

Evenings are for managing home life aspects that require all of us (after the husband gets home from work) and for enjoying time together: games, movies, outings, etc. Sometimes I sneak extra writing time during this time, if there's dad-daughter time going on.

2. Make arrangements for a few ONLY writing days:

For me, that means sending the youngest away (camp, visiting Grandma, overnights at someone else's house, etc.) or sending me away (writing retreat!). I can usually only manage about two weeks of full time writing life across a summer, but they are heaven on earth when they come.

It requires being strict about protecting that time. If the youngest is at camp, I AM NOT filling that time up with errands, even pleasant ones like lunch with my sister. I grab those hours with both hands and hold on tight, refusing to let anything shy of an actual emergency wrest them from my grip.

I also have to be strict with myself about using the time well when I get it. I set priority lists of what to write in what order and am careful not to let myself fritter the time away on social media or writing the wrong things.

My rules for prioritization are: passion level, publication expectations, promises made, and watching out for burnout. Just like every other part of my life, choosing how to spend my writing time is a balancing act, too.

3. Planning ahead helps.

Generally, we plan and shop on Sunday for the entire upcoming week, making note of al the "extra" (not in the usual schedule) things we need/want to do, and making meal plans.

This really helps, because I don't have to spend time on Monday-Friday deciding on meals or shopping them. Those decisions have already been made; all I have to do is follow the plan. That frees up brain space for more fun things like deciding why my male lead's secret twin was a secret.

I plan ahead for my writing time as well, figuring out which day will be spent writing a blog post, which a short story, which focused on the current novel, which on promotion, and so on. I can't do all those things every day, and it helps me to compartmentalize them, promising each task its spotlight moment in turn.

After all this time, I'm good at figuring out what kind of writing I'll be able to do given the constraints of a day: how much time a row I can get, likelihood of interruption, need to devote extra time to other parts of life, etc.

So, there are my ideas for managing a writing life among the other demands I've taken on. How about you, kind readers? Any tips that work for you? How do you protect and arrange time for your creative endeavors?

DIYMFA #9: Trying a New Technique

Building a writing life is all about figuring out what works for you. It's also a lifelong learning experience because change happens: your life circumstances, your writing process, even you-yourself. So, I'm always seeking new things to try. Writing life "hacks" so to speak, despite the negative connotation of "hack" when it comes to writing.  Over the years, I've found some tools and ideas that have made me more efficient and effective, and I hope to keep on finding ways to grow as my career builds.

To that end, I've been slowly reading through DIY MFA: Write with Focus, Read with Purpose, Build your Community by Gabriela Pereira, which is a good compilation of a variety of writing advice with a focus on building a process that will work for you career-long. I've also been participating in the DIYMFA book club.  They've got a very active group over on Facebook. If you're interested in exploring these themes about your own writing, I highly recommend giving them a look!

This week's prompt asked you to try a new technique and talk about how it went for you. The technique I tried was scene cards. I wrote about it previously on this blog here.

It's a form of outlining.

Now, I've never been an outliner. The story doesn't seem to come to me whole-cloth enough for that. I'm more of a quilter as I write, building pieces and then stitching them together afterwards.

But, I was really stuck on my WIP (Thursday's Children, YA, dystopian with shades of romance) last summer. So, I decided to give this a go during my yearly writer's retreat. At worst, it wouldn't work for me and I'd just be where I already was, right?

Story cards ask you to make a card for each scene in your novel, indicating the follow things:

• a title for the scene
• the major players
• the action
• the purpose (structurally)

That last bit (the purpose) turned out to be key for me. It helped me see what each scene was doing in the larger piece. The best scenes had more than one purpose: characterization plus plot reveal moment or conflict building with scene setting.

I did this is as a sort of mid-process mapping. I had already written some 30,000 words on the project. So, I mapped out what I had already written, analyzing it for these four things. I added a color coding element because the book balances three points of view (Kye'luh, Malcolm, and Jason) and I wanted to see if they were balancing, so I wrote the scene card on a different color post-it, depending on whose POV it was told in. I used a fourth color for random thoughts I didn't want to lose and left those off to the side. 

I've done digital version of this before, labeling the chapters in Scrivener with different symbols and using the summary cards there to detail what the content of each chapter was, but the paper version hanging on my wall worked much better for me visually. The day after I finished my descriptive outline of what I'd already written, I made a list of "holes" I needed to fill and ideas for how the story should move forward. Here, six months later, I'm still using this chart to guide my progress and the novel is nearing its end. 

I still don't think I can outline before I write. But as a way to move past my wall when I've run out of steam and need to find my direction again? This was really useful to me. As always, YMMV, because any creative endeavor is highly individual and we all work differently. But hey, if you're stuck, what can it hurt to try something?

My Year in Words

2018 was the first year since I launched my author life in earnest in which I did not publish a novel. I think that's why, here at year's end, I feel like I'm waiting for something. That could also be because I'm also literally waiting for something though. :-) (See November for what we're waiting for).

Here's a look back at 2018 in Samantha's Writing Life: the author events, the words written and revised, the works released, and the books read and reviewed. Given that it was also a year in which my daughter graduated high school, my husband changed jobs, my other daughter started middle school, two people I cared about died, and I took on a new course in my already jam-packed teaching day…I feel pretty good about these stats.

January: 
Events: Illogicon, Taught "Write Your Novel, Part I" for Central Carolina Community College.
Wrote: 35,410 words
Revised: 34,099 words
Read and Reviewed: 2 books

January feels so long ago now that it's a dim memory. I do know though, that I had picked back up in earnest on my WIP: Thursday's Children, a young adult near-future dystopian. That New Year's rush of enthusiasm and commitment kept me going at a good pace for a while.

This book has taken me longer to write than I expected (I'm still working on it in December, which means it's been about 18 months). I'd been spoiled by how much quicker it can be to continue with an established world in a series rather than creating a whole new one, but I'm still happy to be creating something new. Staying on one project too long can be stultifying.

February:
Events: First Monday Classics discussion of War and Peace, Mysticon
Wrote:  27,266 words
Revised:  24,733 words
Read and Reviewed:  3 books

Mid-way through February I lost momentum on the novel. I still wrote every day, but I was cheating on my novel with short stories and blog posts and things that I could complete with a slightly scattered focus.

Conventions are great fun, and a great way to get the word out there about your work, but they do also take a fair bit of time: prepping for your panels and events, social media promotion, and the three days of the convention itself are a pull from whatever else you might have used that time for.

This could also have something to do with the fact that I was the cookie mom for my daughter's Girl Scout troop and February is the height of cookie season…

March:
Events: First Monday Classics discussion of A Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass
Wrote:  28,475 words
Revised:  17,834 words
Read and Reviewed:  5 books

I read a lot in March. It was a "filling the well" sort of month. My momentum on the novel was low. Really, I only tinkered with it, revising a few thousand words and only adding 274 new ones across the entire month.

My publisher was imploding and I was worried about what this meant for my Menopausal Superhero series. I was dreading the confrontation that was coming about breach of contract and rights. I got the flu and part of me wonders if I got it in part because of the emotional stress weakening my reserves.

My support groups were so important in March! They kept me moving forward because I had commitments to uphold: promised chapters, stories, critiques, reviews, or blog posts. When you hit a rough patch, it's good to have friends and colleagues to keep you going.

April:
Events: First Monday Classics discussion of Catch-22, Ravencon
Wrote:  25,791words
Revised:  20,856 words
Read and Reviewed:  8 books

Another month where I started strong on the novel, but fizzled on momentum halfway through the month.  The month included a convention (see above: TIME) and there was a lot of personal life to balance with my writing life: one of my daughters and I both have April birthdays.

When I look back on what I got done in April, I see that my structures served me well. I had planning meetings, networking events, and critique sessions booked in advance and there's nothing like "But I promised" to get me working even when I don't feel like it. I'm very much a "keep your commitments" girl (Thanks, Mom and Dad), so I still wrote every day. It's obvious I was still hiding from the work though when you look at how many books I read.

Ravencon was a highlight. It's a well organized convention and I've enjoyed both my sojourns there as an author guest. This year, Chuck Wendig was there as a the author guest of honor. I managed to introduce myself without making a total ass of myself and we even had a nice conversation about parenting. His munchkin is still quite little, whereas I was preparing to send one to college, so we talked about how weird that is.

May:
Releases: Pen and Cape Society's The Good Fight 4: The Homefront
Events: First Monday Classics discussion of  True Grit,  Free Comic Book Day at Atomic Empire
Wrote:  29,955 words
Revised: 11,139  words
Read and Reviewed:  7 books

May is always hard on schoolteachers. Testing begins and all the work of the past year is called into account. Everyone is exhausted and a little mean, especially the other adults. (see my thoughts on why May should be optional)

Add to that a daughter taking four AP classes and two Honors classes who is about to graduate high school and is managing college and scholarship paperwork alongside a part time job and you have an idea of the tenor of our home life in May. My poor husband! (He's still here in December, so he must really love us).

The new release helped. "Coming Out as Leonel" is one of my favorite Menopausal Superhero shorts that I have written and I was happy to have a chance to get it out to a new audience. (You can get it for free by signing up for my newsletter, BTW). Leonel is a crowd favorite character. Seeing your work in print is always validating and motivating, too.

I made NO HEADWAY on the novel at all in May. 300 words revised one afternoon. I guess so I could still tell myself I was working on it?

I did, however, write a new short story that had been on my backburner for a good long while, and was really pleased with how it came out. "Late Bloomer" is one of my Shadow Hill stories (a series I work on between larger projects, weird stories that all take place in the same suburban neighborhood, suspiciously like the one I live in). The story is out on submission right now, so we'll see if it finds a good home.

I also did a fair amount of journal writing, which is useful to me when I'm going through rougher times. Getting it on paper (on into a document) seems to let me set it aside and focus where I want to.

June:
Events: First Monday Classics discussion of A Wrinkle in Time,  ConCarolinas
Wrote:  24,485 words
Revised:  29,360 words
Read and Reviewed:  4 books

So, I survived and made it to summer break. The girl graduated. The other girl became a middle schooler.

I enjoyed that side step into short stories in May, so I stayed there all of June as well, revising old stories and writing new ones. By the end of the month, I had written 7,128 new words of fiction in short stories and revised another 29,360. That feeling of finishing things is addictive, I think. It's definitely one of the appeals of writing shorter things.

Working with a friend, I built a database of what was available for submission with the intention of getting my work back out there in submission. After all, no one will publish stories that just sit on my hard drive. You've got to submit work to see it published!

That meant that I still stayed stuck on the novel though. I didn't check in on it at all during June. Not even a token afternoon of editing like I'd done in May.

ConCarolinas was contentious in 2018, and I waffled until the last minute about whether or not to keep my commitment to go after some controversy surrounding one of the scheduled guests and his behavior towards other panelists and con go-ers. He ended up not attending, and I ended up having a great con, both in terms of sales and networking, and the controversy remained low-key, at least in my presence.

I was on several panels with Seanan McGuire, the author guest of honor, an experience which only deepened my admiration of her work. I gifted her the last print copy of Going Through the Change I had with me when she expressed interest, and I'm hopeful that she might even read it someday :-)

July:
Events: First Monday Classics discussion of The Good Earth, Con-Gregate, my yearly Writers Retreat
Wrote:  34,832 words
Revised:  15,303 words
Read and Reviewed:  2 books

Thank goodness for writer's retreats! My critique group has, for the past few years, scheduled a few days away from home in July for writing. We rent a house together, share meal planning and prep, and write and talk about writing, enjoying the respite from our other responsibilities.

This year, we went to Pelican House at the Trinity Center in Morehead City, NC, a place where I have taken writing retreats solo before. I love it because the meals are prepared for me and there's a lot of lovely setting to explore when you need to clear your head.

This is where I found my footing in my novel again. I'd been reading Gabiela Pereira's DIY MFA, which is a great collection and analysis of a variety of advice surrounding writing process and productivity. There's a technique she suggests called scene cards. I've never been an outliner, but I thought it couldn't hurt and might help, so I gave it a go. I wrote about it more detail in this blog post. But the TL;DR is: it worked! I started moving forward in the story again.

August:
Events: First Monday Classics discussion of The Grifters
Wrote:  21,201 words
Revised:  16,286 words
Read and Reviewed:  2 books

So, 21,201 might not look that impressive when I just said that I found my footing in the novel again, but 3,225 new words and 16,186 revised words on a project that had all but stalled felt wonderful! I worked on it steadily, too. A little each day, with real progress on over half the days of the month. Thursday's Children was back on the road to becoming a completed novel.

August also came with a bit of an ego bump, just when I needed it. A magazine found me and sought me out for an author interview. That "out of the blue" stuff is the best! I definitely appreciate it when friends and colleagues notice and promote my work, but part of me thinks they only do it because they like me, as a person. So, it's personal rather than professional recognition. When it's a stranger, it's easier to believe that they honestly admire the work.

September:
Events: Ravencon 13.5
Wrote:  26,512 words
Revised:  13,355 words
Read and Reviewed: 6 books

Spring 2018 had been rough in terms of time management and I decided that going forward, I would do fewer spring events and show a little respect for the demands of my day job and family as well as my own physical and emotional limits. So, I was thrilled when Ravencon added a .5 event, a smaller convention in September. I signed up right away and had a wonderful time! 

Since some of the bigger name authors who travel the same convention circuit I do weren't there, I got to feel like a bigger fish in the pond than is typical. The whole convention had an intimate feel that was right for my comfort levels as an introvert faking comfort with public events.

September was also good for forward momentum on Thursday's Children, with another 2,378 in new words added and 13,355 in revisions. Revisions in my case often means serious expansion of a skeletal scene or structural re-arrangement, so those 13K words are not to be sneezed at as window dressing or surface edits. They are real progress.

October:
Releases: "The Girl in the Pool" a daylight ghost story in Off the Beaten Path 3; "Ashes" a southern gothic demon lover tale in Beyond the Pane
Events: First Monday Classics discussion of Les Misérables, Conapalooza, Real Life Ghost Stories
Wrote:  36,444 words
Revised:  0 words
Read and Reviewed:  3 books

I didn't work on my novel in October.

The difference was that it was intentional.

A friend of mine does a flash fiction challenge each October called Nightmare Fuel. She provides visual prompts and the participants write flash fiction to go with each. I've participated for a couple of years now and I find that the story-a-day format is a great refresher, a sort of vacation from the work of writing to remember that it's fun by playing with work that I'm not applying as much pressure on. (You can view the stories I wrote for the challenge here).

More than once, these play-pieces I've begun for Nightmare Fuel have grown into something I saw published, which goes to show that leaving yourself space to play can be good for your work.

I also wrote 31 blog posts here at Balancing Act in October, each celebrating an aspect of Halloween. Once in a while, it's nice to just let my inner fan girl squee about the things she loves, you know.

Conapalooza was fun, if light on sales. They're new, in an area of the country where there aren't that many conventions and geek-centric events, so I think they'll continue to see growth in upcoming years. A highlight was hearing my sister do her first public reading of her work. Yep, writing is contagious y'all. Watch out, or you might catch it, too!

The big news was that the tension with my publisher resolved. I asked for and received my rights back without struggle or animosity. I'm so relieved!

November:
Events: First Monday Classics discussion of To the Lighthouse, Local Authors Book Fair
Wrote:  27,828 words
Revised:  28,723 words
Read and Reviewed: 2 books

I jumped back into Thursday's Children with both feet on November first and made steady progress all month, adding 7,162 new words and revising 20,723.

I also made a big push on submitting all those short stories I worked on earlier in the year, which including a bit of revision time on those as well. All in all, I made 17 submissions in the month of November. For comparison, I submitted 0-1 pieces all the other months in 2018.

The Local Authors Book Fair held by my local Friends of the Public Library was a great success. I sold a fair number of books, made some new writer friends, and had a great day.

I signed with a new publisher! The Menopausal Superhero series will soon be re-released and carried by Falstaff Books, of Charlotte, NC. I'm so pleased to have signed with Falstaff. Everything I know of them is positive, and I expect to be treated fairly and expand my readership under their auspices. I'll share publication dates and information as soon as I have it!

Knowing that my books are in a stable home has me excited about the series again and I expect to get back to that long-stalled fourth book in the series in 2019.

December: (numbers as of December 21)
Releases: Tracing the Trails: A Constant Reader's Reflections on the Work of Stephen King
Events: First Monday Classics discussion of Little House in the Big Woods
Wrote:  23,172 words
Revised:  8,756 words
Read and Reviewed:  4 books

December has continued the positive trends started in November, with steady progress on the novel and continuing to get my work out there on submission. A few rejections came back and I just immediately turned those puppies around and sent them seeking a home somewhere else. 

A writing partner, Nicole Givens Kurtz, and I have sent out proposals for our nonfiction teaching book On Teaching Speculative Fiction and I'm feeling hopeful that we'll find a good home for our work. 

A nonfiction essay I wrote about Stephen King's collection of short stories, Nightmares and Dreamscapes (especially Dolan's Cadillac) was published in Tracing the Trails,  a labor of love from a long-time writing friend and my nemesis on the Magic Spreadsheet, Chad A. Clark. 

I feel as though I'm ending 2018 on a positive and productive note that will carry me into 2019 full of hope and energy. So despite the rollercoaster feeling of the year, I'm glad I got on the ride!

Retreat! Taking a step back to move forward (now with scene cards!)

The word retreat is a funny one. It can mean giving up the fight and running away. It can also mean a purposeful step back, a repose or reflection. This year I needed both.

I had dropped my novel entirely in May and June, choosing instead to work on short fiction to match my shorter focus (end of school year teaching + graduating daughter = scatterbrained Samantha). I was having a hard time getting back into the flow and picking the project back up. I felt lost in my own novel. All my momentum had fallen still.

My critique group has a tradition (we've done it three times now, so that's a tradition, right?) of taking a summer writing retreat. We pool our funds and rent someplace nice for a few days in July and go and write our fingers off. This year's retreat was at Pelican House, part of the Trinity Center in Salter Path, NC. I've been on two previous writing retreats here with the RCWMS and when my group said they wanted beach instead of mountains this year, I suggested here.

3 Views from my retreat

Besides the access to the sea and the wetlands, wonderful for walking and thinking or clearing your head, this complex offers a variety of working and contemplation areas and a dining hall, so I can just show up and eat without having to give over any time to meal preparation (anyone who prepares the meals at their house will understand how much time that really is). And, especially for beach access, it was very inexpensive. Just over $300 covered my share of three nights food and lodging. 

But, I'm not meaning to make this blogpost into an ad for Pelican House. I'm meaning to write about the value of a retreat. 

I'm a writer with a full time job (sometimes more than full time: I teach) and a family (a husband, a teen/young adult, a tween, and a rescue dog), so my writing is often in the backseat of my life, crammed into the corners where I can stuff it. I'm pretty good at being productive this way. In the five years since I "went pro" by signing my first book contract, I've completed two more novels, several short stories, and drafted three other novels that are simmering on my back burner now. But, it's not easy. Too often I lose the flow because I can't get enough focus: either I'm short on time, or my mental and emotional energy is pulled somewhere else. 

But a retreat is dedicated time. 

• I go somewhere else, so I can't get distracted by the state of my house and decide that clean towels matter more than fresh words. Out of my usual element is a good place for fresh starts.
• I make arrangements for my children and dog (the husband went with me this time, but even if he hadn't, he'd make his own arrangements). I put off any other life business and really, truly live only my writing life for a few days. No teaching life. No home life. No mom life. Just writing. 
• I go with trusted writing friends, which leaves room for talk and discussion to help hash out ideas if I want it, and makes my company people who will understand if I find a zone and ignore them for eight hours, too. 
• I go with a clear goal. This year, mine was to map out what I've already written, trying using storycards for the first time to organize my vision, and then to get back into writing this book!

StoryCards for Thursday's Children, Day 1

I feel really good about the progress I made. Not only am I feeling focused on this book, I think using storycards might be my new M.O. 

I've tried doing this digitally with Scrivener and other tools, but it wasn't really working for me. So, I went with paper and pen. Sometimes, changing the tools you use can make all the difference in how it works for your brain. I'm mostly a digital tools kind of writer, but I do find that some things work better for me on paper and by hand.

Orange notecards here are Kye'luh Wade's (my main character). Green ones are Jason Berger. Yellow ones are Malcolm Singletary. Pink ones are rando-thoughts that I didn't want to lose about problems to fix or other chapters to write, sort of my "parking lot" for stuff to pick up later. 

When I sat down to do this, I had about 50K of the novel written, all pantsed. I've seen several different versions of storycards, storyboarding, post-it outlining, or whatever you want to call this process. Most recently, I'd read DIY MFA by Gabriela Pereira (well, part of it; I'm not done yet). Pereira calls this process "scene cards" and says that each scene card should include: a title, a list of major players, a description of the action, and a statement of the scene's purpose. That last part is crucial for pantsers like me, who are always looking to impose structure after the fact. 

So, that's what I did first: made a scene card for each chapter I had already written, adding the color coding element for my three point of view characters to watch for balance among them as well. 

It was enlightening. 

Sometimes I couldn't easily name a purpose for a scene, or I could only name one purpose and it didn't seem like a very important one. Sometimes, I ran into a glut of several chapters in a row with a single character, leaving my other storylines hanging too long.  Sometimes I spotted a GIANT hole where there's nothing to connect an earlier scene to what happens later. 

This was so helpful! It probably also helped that I was far enough into the process to have a little distance. It almost felt like I was the helpful friend examining someone else's books to find the flaws and help fix them, rather than being my own critic. It felt like good useful work instead of self-recrimination or negative self-talk.

So, does this mean I'm an outliner/planner now?

I don't think so.

I think my process will still involve a fair amount of exploratory/discovery writing where I pants my way across the countryside waiting for the story to tell me what it's about. But I think I'll get to a point on each project, where this will become useful and will help me get to the end and build a more coherent first full draft. So, I'm excited about finding something new that works for me!